Well, it’s good to be back…I have to say that because that’s what people say when they come back from holiday except I’m telling porky pies!! It’s not good to be back at all!!!
My eldest sister and I decided to go on a road trip just like Thelma and Louise, without the encounter with Brad Pitt and without driving off the White Cliffs of Dover at the end……
…we drove to Paris to stay with the other sister and we had such a good time….of course we took Charlie with us. He is, of course, an international Jetsetter, now he has his own passport…I tell you there’s no stopping him! We went for a week and it was superb, we shared the driving, (not Charlie obviously, he was the co-pilot) two hours on and two hours off, stopping for coffee and letting Charlie stretch his legs. The journey went really well and for two grey haired old ladies I think we did exceptionally well not to get tooted at by the French as they do like to let you know when you do something wrong!! We really felt as though we had achieved something great!
On the way out we popped the GPS Sat Nav on the dashboard and chose the voice of Ozzy Osbourne, now I don’t know whether that was a good idea or not, as we just giggled every time he said something!! ( I’m afraid it was all too rude to put down here in writing but trust me…it was very funny!) Although we did find he was a little slow and we’d normally taken the turning just before he kicked in…we decided he’d had far too much to drink!!
On our return journey, we decided we would change the voice to the very lovely and very English, Jane, well she started beautifully although her pronunciation of French towns left a bit to be desired but she did tell us which roads we needed. The she had a dicky fit and led me onto the Boulevard Peripheric (which, trust me, should be avoided at all costs!). Then, the silly mare decided to take me off on a service road to the Stade de France….we were not amused, just in time we saw a sign for Lille, figured it was up north towards the UK and took that and we were back on track in no time! Although it took Jane a good hour to work out where we were going!! So the moral of the story is never judge a book by it’s accent….go with a drunk rock star every time!! It was more fun and a lot less stressful!!
While we were away it rained, no, I lie, it didn’t rain, it poured constantly for 3 whole days!!! It was a deluge but we snuggled up on the sofas, three sisters catching up, chatting, eating, drinking and laughing, it was wonderful!
We walked Charlie every day, now I have to tell you about French Dogs – they have a serious flaw. They are so badly behaved!!!
As we walked through the village there were dogs everywhere, now anyone who follows me on this blog, will know that I’m a bit of a dog fanatic and love them all even if they have three legs, one eye and mange!!
Well these dogs would literally throw themselves at the gates, fences and hedges barking and growling as we walked by…I couldn’t believe my ears, it was mayhem! Charlie was so dignified and walked on calmly, I’m sure he was terrified but kept his cool as he managed to keep it together as staffies, poodles, boxers, vizlas, JR’s and many other breeds screamed abuse at him. He’s such a gent:)
On one such walk, a van pulled up, the driver opened the door and out flew (yes flew) a massive coffee table of a dog, teeth bared, hackles up, and it had a bum magnet in it’s nose which stuck fast onto Charlie’s behind….he was not amused, he can put up with most things but “noses up butts” is a no-no!! My sister, who had him on a lead upped the pace, with a sharp “Walk on!” the offending canine followed, the driver of the van in the meantime was running down the road towards us, sweating profusely with a worried look on his face, this didn’t make me feel any easier, fortunately it all ended well, he got the dog gave it a damn good shouting at and took it back to the van. With not so much as an “Excusez moi, Pardon or Bonne Journee!!” ….
…I can’t even begin to tell you the noise in the neighbourhood, there must have been 20 dogs, barking, snarling, frothing at the mouth and throwing themselves at the flimsy barriers that kept them away from Charlie and Charlie safe from certain death!!!
By the end of the walk we’d all calmed down, we came across a dear little lady walking her dear, old pooch, “Ah Bonjour Madame, qu’il est beau votre chien” We chatted, the dog was called Sam, he was 12 years old, ahh lovely an OAP just like Charlie, he came forward to say hello and damn near took Charlie’s face off, what is it with these French dogs. Now I reckon they either have no manners, don’t like the English, or the owners have no idea how to socialise their best mates….I’m going with the last option. That’s it, I’m going to up sticks move to France and show them how to educate their dogs!!!
Anyway, we’re back and guess what, I’ve got a really nasty chest infection, so I’m not going into work, which you won’t believe I’m sorry about, I get on really well with my colleagues and I was really looking forward to seeing them but I’m just not up to it! So it’s coughing fits, antibiotics, naps on the sofa until I feel better. Oh and I have a dreaded cholesterol test tomorrow, have a feeling that won’t be good news. I love my food too much.
In the meantime I’m on the PC playing with my photos…for a change. I thought I would let you know that I have a special offer on at the moment as Father’s Day is approaching here in the UK. Click on the photo below…..for the page with all the details!